October 09, 2007
Skidder Man
A few weeks ago LB was invited to yet another birthday party. And it finally dawned on me, all those billboards and graph charts loudly proclaiming that a baby is gonna break you, coming in a 70K a year or whatever, are taking into account all the birthday party presents for other kids one has to buy (because otherwise what could it be? snack and soda? I don't know...). Still we don't fit onto their stinkin' charts, because even when the invite makes no mention of us being gift enough so no present is required, we make our presents (finger puppets, wooded puzzles, dressup hats). Anyway, this post isn't so much about the gifts -- which turned out to be a hero activity book made entirely by LB -- but about the costumes.
Yes, apparently there was gift expectation and costume expectation, those billboard/graph chart-figuring-people must have known about this eventuality, because I sure didn't.
The kids were supposed to come dressed as their favorite hero. My boy, with no prompting from me to think out of the (store-bought) box decided to be SKIDDER MAN, sometimes shortened without warning or explanation to SKID MAN, I know, right? Skidder man?
He spend some time planning his costume, drawing it, coloring it. I braced myself for the inevitable conversation of Hey baby, papa's out of town this week and he's the one that knows how to work that fancy sewing machine, wouldn't you rather just be hobo-man? You could wear trash! But that conversation never had to happen, Skidder Man, at least from the pictures, looked like a lazy mother's dream costume, it consisted of orange shorts, red shoes, a cape, goggles, and 2 little red circles on his illustrated Skidder man's chest.
Me: Honey, what are those 2 red circles on Skidder Man's chest?
LB: Those are Skidder Man's nipples
Me: Wait, Skidder Man isn't wearing a shirt? You have to wear a shirt. You can't go to a kid's birthday party, at their house, wearing goggles, a cape, and no shirt. This isn't babylon baby.
LB: Skidder Man wears no shirt. Skidder Man proudly displays his nipples!
Yes, he said that! Skidder Man wears no shirt. Skidder Man proudly displays his nipples!
In the end we used an A-shirt that was a bit too small (thus promoting the Queer as Folk reference above) with Skid Man's emblem on the front, an SK and then, because I didn't center the emblem so well, a little skid mark on the side to balance it all out, you know, aesthetically.
I never could really get a feel for what Skidder Man's powers were, aside from nipple pride. It's been bugging me ever since...
That is hilarious! Maybe he's onto something...we all oughta be more proud of our nipples?
What a creative, funny kid. Be proud of him!
Posted by: amanda at October 9, 2007 09:02 AMThat is hilarious!! What a great kid.
Holly
That's priceless :-D How fun to have such a wacky kidlet!
Posted by: Jen at October 9, 2007 11:51 PMSkidder Man's nipples are his gift! That's awesome. It's too darn bad that homeschool kids are mostly pretty well taken care of. I need some groovy homeschoolers to hire me to hang out with them all day, instead of trying to make my living working with public school kids.
I came across your podcast on iTunes a week or so ago, and from there to your blog. I'd love to hear some more podcasts. Do you plan to make more? I'd even share a story or two from my misspent youth, if that would tempt you ;)
Posted by: DeAnna at October 11, 2007 06:58 PMGod, Jacey, LB is such an awesome kid! I mean, Skidderman! You know, this is the stuff that makes life perfect...thank God you guys let him be who he wants to be.
xox
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