Insubordiknit

Knitter gone awry

This is how you see me, isn't it? Prancing around my house, pits 'aflowing, heat cranked up to 80, wearing a handknit halter that the best (and I don't just say that because she buys so much yarn, but because she's awesome and kind and sweet and generous) customer-turned-friend in the world sent me, sipping some home-brewed and mysterious liquid that not only makes you long, lean, and strong, but also endearingly tipsy. I know, it's the carefree and enviable mystique I cultivate.

It's just a front though. Observe, an insubordi-knitter-gone-awry in her natural habitat, it's rarely seen, pay close attention:

ohh, first she's posing, looking a bit too happy with herself considering what she's...what? is that the fabled bea arthur coccoon sweater? It can't be...I thought it was a myth...knit in once piece, starting at the horizontal middle of the back? it boggles the mind.

and clearly our subject has become boggled of mind, or addled, perhaps. She seems to be caught, tangled, or could it be that it's actually attacking her.

Yes, yes, I think it is attacking her. She's trying so hard, you see the beads of perspiration flying off her crazed face? She no longer in her zen place. Look at that raw fear and panic. I fear the worst for our troubled knitter...

Yes...the worst had indeed come to pass. She's gone. Not truly dead, but more like in a living knitting death. Notice the glassy eyes, the contorted body, the smug and partially knitted object, not too many knitters make it back from the living knitting dead. A shame, that's what it is. Take heed it doesn't strike you. Take heed, and give bea arthur the respect she so deserves.

Posted by jacey at March 27, 2006 06:49 PM